Hillsboro is a nice town.
I lived there for a couple of years, and the only two things I have to say against it are (1) the unfortunate proclivity of developers to build "community villages", with "covenents" that can allow the property managers to fine you if you don't cut your grass once a week, and (2) the city park is ... or was, then ... the hunting ground for drug dealers (mostly undocumented immigrants") who were prepared to defent their turf with violence. The good news: The "Community Police Station", located across the road from the park, never had to bust skate-boarders.
But it retains one iconic community gathering location: bowling alleys.
In the middle of the movie, when 'color' begins to permeat the town, J.T. Walsh gathers his cronies in a defensive position and says: "Thank God we're in a Bowling Alley!"
That's the kind of town Hillsboro represents.
On with the story.
According to the May 29 story, this kid tried to swipe a couple of purses from folks who seemed to be too intent on the serious business of bowling, when someone noticed what he was doing.
Then ... but I can't say it any better than the OregonLive reporter:
Oh, it gets even better after that. I have no wish to steal the thunder of the original author, so I implore you to go there and read the last few paragraphs.
HILLSBORO - It turned out to be Pound-A-Punk day Wednesday at the Hillsboro Park Lanes Family Entertainment Center, a bowling alley in Hillsboro.
A 16-year-old would-be thief reportedly tried to swipe two purses from tables inside the bowling alley at 6360 S.E. Alexander St.
Then, at least from the teen's perspective, things went terribly awry.
The purses weren't the easy pickings he apparently thought they'd be. They belonged to two ladies from V.I.P. Summer Trio, a senior league, said Lanes owner Dean Johnson.
The women, along with other bowlers from the senior league, blocked the 16-year-old's escape through an exit on the building's west side. When he ran toward the glass doors at the building's front, league members were in hot and loud pursuit.
"One lady started screaming," said Nathan Krawitz, 44, who saw the whole thing.
Johnson said others in the league also sprang into action.
"A bunch of the senior ladies and senior men started hollering at him and chased him," Johnson said. "That's when Steve, my son, kind of held him down."
It seem like a small story to you, but to me it's one more persuasive argument for "Bowling Ball Control"!
If it saves just one child ...