Wednesday, August 26, 2009

IPSC Haiku: Archive It

I just wrote an article which linked to "IPSC HAIKU", presented on Jeff Maass' webpage.

Ordinarily I would not steal material from another webpage, but since Jeff has decided to go out of the "IPSC LOADS" publication venture and other IPSC and shooting-related stuff (I don't see a link more recent than 2006), I decided to duplicate the material here, rather than to lose it. I don't feel too uncomfortable "stealing" this, because I contributed a significant amount of the material. Besides, it includes material from individuals who have been shooting IPSC and/or USPSA competition for a ong time, and you may recognize some of them.

If you have a new IPSC Haiku, I hope you will send it to me (see email addy at the bottom of the page) so I can continue to grow this innovative, interesting ... inane ... compilation.

I have a new host for my archival files, but until I learn how to use it I'll just post it here where I can always find it.

This is, as Jeff has stated, taken from a 2001 thread on the Unofficial IPSC List.
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By Vince Pinto

Darth Alexakos
From the Dark Side of the Force
Has a great vision.

#########

Offer more options
To all the competitors
To broaden our sport.

#########

But keeping the old
Such as targets and scoring
Everybody smile.

#########

Long live the great Darth
And his faithful servant Vince
Woof, Woof, Woof, Click, Wheeze.

************************************************

By Tom Frenkel

Things are quiet here;
no one writes me anything;
I will take a nap.

************************************************

By Jim Boemler

The Geek do haiku
Better than you and me do
Nails the creepers too

#########

Powder saved for naught
Bullet is but a feather
One seventy four

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Nick and Vinny plot
Rob and Mikey do see red
We wait and wonder

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Scoring and targets
Conspiracy theories
Tempests in teacup

#########

Lots of lead downrange
More, reload, more, reload, more
Steel stands proud and tall

#########

Earthworm tumbles down
Bullets choke in the barrel
Pizza saves the day

#########

This haiku addicts us
Each phrase ridiculous
Two alpha it's gone

#########

Open-gun fire storm
Bullets whizzing everywhere
Targets unafraid

#########

Errant syllable
Embarrassment surrounds us
Time to hit the sack

#########

Targets with no heads
Scores different from before
Hell in handbasket


************************************************

By "Jerry The Geek"

Brown cardboard target
Needs two holes. I see just one.
A perfect double!

#########

Gravity Turner,
What did I do to you, eh?
That you fall so fast?

#########

Wind blows the steel down.
Range Equipment Malfunction!
I get a reshoot.

#########

The Safety Area ...
you can't handle ammo there.
Okay to dry-fire.

#########

Your SV Fails you.
Should have bought an STI.
Dave Skinner says so.

#########

Area One is
Having a tournament soon.
A Space Oddity!

#########

The 2001
RO Examination
Has a trick question.

#########

Rain drops, mud puddles,
Soggy cardboard bends its head.
Put on plastic bags.

#########

Exciting IP_SiC
Adrenaline flows like wine.
You are drunk with speed.

#########

Just one bullet hole?
Cry: "It's a Double, Dammit!"
RO will believe you.

#########

Eight shots through Port "A",
Make mandatory reload;
Else, procedural.

#########

Sunshine and gunsmoke
And the company of friends.
What more could you ask?

#########

You're getting tired of
Taping holes with masking tape?
Go buy a tape gun.

#########

The RKBA
Issues are a distraction:
We just want to shoot!

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Classifier is
Ten Percent over your class.
Too bad. Throw it out.

#########

Run fast, Grasshopper!
Double-tap all ten targets
In under twelve seconds.

************************************************

By Millard Ellingsworth

Quality unknown
Better relative to what?
More poems for you.

#########

Ten rounds only, frown.
Equipment race is over.
Must now learn to shoot!

#########

Level playing field:
I Don't Practice Anymore
What have you done, Bill?

#########

High Cap STI:
It's Kalifornia Dreaming!
Boring guns pass test.

#########

Fuzzy outline seen.
Sights wobble, pull trigger now!
Speed is what matters.

#########

Complaining endless.
Where to gather for big match.
Weather keeps them in.

#########

Les Baer poster boy,
Wise one says: move fast, shoot slow.
Scores continue climb.

#########

No window constrains.
Three iron bars bisect it.
A-zone has two holes!

#########

Optics for sissies
Or old men with failing eyes.
Limited best way.

#########

Focus shift too slow.
C-More so that I see more
Red dot shows the spot.

****************************************************

By Robert J. Woolley

Eight-shot revolver
Outlawed by the new rulebook
Better luck next time

#########

But does it matter?
Can't reload fast anyway.
Will make do with six.

****************************************************

By Gene Bray

shooting faster As
shooter saunters to new box
fast shots, ringing steel

****************************************************

By Scot Johnson

standing reload, damn
curse it, curse it, little plate
dodges lead tsunami

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