IPSC: You know you're over 50 when ....

A few years ago, the Unofficial IPSC List indulged in "IPSC HAIKU". Jeff Maass posted the results to the internet, and the response from IPSC'ers was surprising. (Thanks, Jeff.)

It's about time we tried that again, so I've chosen to publish a list of the things "You know you're over 50 when ..."

I stole the concept from the SASS Forum (my bad) but it looked like fun. So I'll try it here.

Got better ideas? Send 'em in. I'll add to the list, and attribute your suggestion unless you specifically say I shouldn't. Add suggests to the COMMENTS section of this page, or send me an email at the address listed at the very bottom of this page. Not the bottom of the article, the bottom of the PAGE.

You Know You're Over 50 When ...

1. (Geek) -You go to The Dark Side because you can't see those fuzzy sights on your Limited Gun.
2. (Geek) - On the firing line, you can see your pistol grips, you can see your magazine basepads, but you can't see your belt. Or your toes.
   
3. (Geek) - When you give advice, somebody actually seems to be listening.
4. (Geek) - You decide to shoot for accuracy, not for speed.
5. (Geek) - A new shooter calls you 'sir', and he's displaying Male Pattern Baldness.
6. (Geek) - You go to a match, and they've left your usual parking space for you ... by the privy.
7. (Geek) - During the match walk-through, you raise a finger and say "Excuse me", and the MD says "Oh geez, not again!"
8. (Geek) - Your best stage at the match involves no movement after the draw.
9. (Geek) - You win "Top Old Coot" prize for the match, and you are proud of your accomplishment.
10. (Geek) - You tell someone how long you've been shooting IPSC, and they're impressed.
11. (Geek) - You know the significance of "The Toilet Paper" version of the rule book.
12. (Geek) - You own a golf-shirt that looks like this on the back.
13. (Hobo Brasser) - You are beyond the point in the curve where ability (falling) and age (rising) cross.
14. (Mr. Completely) - You have three pairs of glasses, one pair to wear driving to the match, one pair if most of the targets are close in, and the third pair for when most of the targets are farther out. Even so, most of your shots are guesses!
15. (Your contribution here)
    

UPDATE (December 3):
I'm seeing a trend here.
So far, all of the contributions are by guys who are over 60.

I also received an email from friend Bob H. ("Antipoda") from Texas, who contends that the condition of being "over 50" is NOTHING compared to being "over 60". He's hoping to wake up and discover that 7 years and 5 months have been deducted from his age, so he is qualified to whine about being "over 50".

He is probably correct. I can attest to the fact that I didn't start slowing down until after I turned 50. But I still could see iron sights until about the time I turned 60. (Actually, a few months before my birthday.)

Perhaps I should have titled the article: "You know you're over 60 when ... ". I had thought that there would be fewer people interesting in discussing the differences between 40 and 50 than 50 and 60, but perhaps I was wrong.

Could be. I've been wrong before.

I'll let this run as "over 50" for a while, in hopes that someone will be able to pinpoint the trauma of turning fifty. And I'll detail an incident which is specifically pertinent to "whiney old men" (all of them over 60) in my forthcoming review of the "Pistol Caliber Carbine Match), probably later tonight.